[There's something comforting about the cold, vengeful truth in Cloud's words, more certainty than he's used to hearing from the other man. Sometimes he forgets, through the haze of bad memories and mako-fuzz at the edges of his consciousness - because he's not immune, just better adjusted, and mako is and has always been poison, so five years in that place is going to linger in little ways for the rest of his life - that Cloud is well past the young and hopeful trooper he'd been when they first met. That they're both grown, both fundamentally changed in ways that only the two of them are likely to understand. He clings to the certainty in Cloud's voice, the promise he speaks to the wind that sings straight to Zack's soul. Tear it apart. Yes. Nobody else gets hurt.Yes.
For a moment after Cloud finishes speaking, there's no response and no movement on Zack's end; he has to pause and wonder, as he drags his mind away from the misery funk, if he'd just imagined what happened. It was a subtle gesture, so very easy to miss, but firm and undeniable at the same time. He could ignore it if he was a coward, pretend that his SOLDIER perception was too tired or rain-muddled to catch that pressure of a mouth on his hair. He's felt it before, though. He won't ever forget what that feels like, what it is.
He should move, he knows. Get up, be useful, work to get their camp in decent order, walk the rounds to make sure they're truly safe, check on their bike so they don't break down or end up with rain in the gas tank. Don't ruin this by wanting too much. But Cloud's here, Cloud's sitting with him, holding him, and gods if it isn't the first time in what feels like ages that he feels truly, genuinely grounded, despite everything they've been through, everything they had to do to get here. "You 'n me," he said, holding Zack like he was everything, like he might never let go.
He wants this. Too much.
When the moment passes he shifts his position just enough to catch Cloud's eyes, his expression searching, hopeful, almost. His lips are so close to a smile, on the very cusp of it and holding off, entirely dependent on Cloud's response.]
You with me, Cloud?
[With me. Not just with me, but with me. His hand shifts, finding Cloud's where it winds around his body, holding it there to keep him close.]
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momijizukamori
HONK HONK IT'S A SLOW THREAD PARTY
Date: 2020-07-29 07:35 am (UTC)For a moment after Cloud finishes speaking, there's no response and no movement on Zack's end; he has to pause and wonder, as he drags his mind away from the misery funk, if he'd just imagined what happened. It was a subtle gesture, so very easy to miss, but firm and undeniable at the same time. He could ignore it if he was a coward, pretend that his SOLDIER perception was too tired or rain-muddled to catch that pressure of a mouth on his hair. He's felt it before, though. He won't ever forget what that feels like, what it is.
He should move, he knows. Get up, be useful, work to get their camp in decent order, walk the rounds to make sure they're truly safe, check on their bike so they don't break down or end up with rain in the gas tank. Don't ruin this by wanting too much. But Cloud's here, Cloud's sitting with him, holding him, and gods if it isn't the first time in what feels like ages that he feels truly, genuinely grounded, despite everything they've been through, everything they had to do to get here. "You 'n me," he said, holding Zack like he was everything, like he might never let go.
He wants this. Too much.
When the moment passes he shifts his position just enough to catch Cloud's eyes, his expression searching, hopeful, almost. His lips are so close to a smile, on the very cusp of it and holding off, entirely dependent on Cloud's response.]
You with me, Cloud?
[With me. Not just with me, but with me. His hand shifts, finding Cloud's where it winds around his body, holding it there to keep him close.]